7 Ways to Practice Imperfect Hospitality

1. Find a style that works for you.

Stick with it and know that it’s okay to use the same dishes every time you have guests into your home, or the same tablecloth, and that potluck is really easy. Learn not to compare yourself with others. Step out today and invite someone for coffee and coffecake, or for cake and ice cream, or for Taco dip and chips. A simmering pot of soup is so inviting. Just do it.

2. Don’t invite more people…

…than you are comfortable seating around your table. Don’t over-commit.

3. Cook and serve the same three recipes over and over.

Practice makes perfect!. You’ll eventually master and memorize the recipe. I used to serve Baked Ziti every time we had guests for dinner. As I built confidence, I expanded my menus. When we were first in ministry we used to have people over on Sunday Nights and serve pop-corn and cool-aid. We had a blast and so did our company.

4. Remember that when you invite people to your home, they are coming to see you.

Your guests want to meet your family and learn more about your traditions in your home and around your table. They don’t want to be impressed. We have had many 'bloopers' including serving a dish that was 'rotten'....I blushed and got over it. They came back too....because it's not about being impressed.

5. Don’t try to do it all.

Include the family in doing chores, setting the table, and setting a standard that is “good enough,” not necessarily perfect.

6. Be intentional.

Consider inviting people you want to introduce to one another, or who you want to get to know more yourself.

7. Lean into your fears.

Why do I call it imperfect hospitality? Because not every element of fellowship will ever be perfect.

Maybe your dishes won’t match perfectly, maybe a dish will end up under- or over-cooked, or maybe your smoke alarm will go off! Figure out what works for you personally when it comes to fellowship. I believe it has a lot to do with our personalities and what we can handle, so learn to stop doing the things that make you feel like a failure, and do the things that are simple and easy.

And if unexpected things happen, laugh—and your company will laugh along with you.

When it comes to hospitality, what are your strengths? Your weaknesses?

Invite someone over this week!

Sometimes hospitality requires more courage than we think we possess. Maybe you could raise your hand and say, “Yes, I could use a dose of more courage.”

I’ve often shied away from courage, because I knew that it could be disruptive to my life; that it would knock me out of my safety zone. To be honest, I really like comfort.

5 signs you’re in a “safety zone”:

1. You haven’t had people in your home for at least six months.
2. You worry too much about the appearance of your house.
3. You haven’t forged a new friendship in a year.
4. You’ve become obsessed with your family’s problems.
5. You haven’t tried a new recipe in months; your cooking is in a rut.

Sometimes we love safety so much that it stifles us. And when we’re stifled, we don’t grow beyond a certain point, which means we miss out on many of life’s blessings. Hospitality is one of those life blessings.

I’ve learned more about courage as I matured and started emulating courageous people I admired. I realized some unhealthy patterns that weren’t working in my life, and that I had some unhealthy relationships that always fostered negative conversations. I learned to be more courageous by pushing past my fears.

We are commanded to 'brotherly love'. Some have entertained 'angels unawares' by having other over for a meal, coffee or just snacks. So many of us have the idea we need to have it all together to invite others over. No, you don't and I don't. Just do it!

10 steps to courageous hospitality

1. Know that you are valuable and important to God, and made in His image.
2. Know there are others waiting to be shown concern and love away from Church.
3. Focus your will onto something meaningful (relationships!).
4. Lean into your fears; learn that things do not have to be perfect.
5. Learn that people usually don’t care about the things that bother you.
6. Learn to take a small hill. Start small and invite people into your life.
7. Make soul-friends, friends who can speak into your life as well as listen to you speak into theirs.
8. Love the unlovely. Does it really matter what your house looks like?
9. Combat materialism. You don’t need the newest or the best.
10. Fight cynicism, which can drain us of hope, creativity, and energy — all building blocks for courage.

Gaining courage will help you put fears, worries, and imperfections aside, and you’ll be able to love more deeply.

I’ve learned that courage doesn’t just come to you. It takes prayer, effort and willingness, and it often puts you at risk. A few weeks ago when we had a brand new couple into our home, we took the risk that they’d want to get to know us, to come into our home, and share an evening with us.

We knew we were interested in pursuing a friendship with them, but you just never know what another person’s reaction will be. We’re so glad they said yes. Our lives are richer now that we’ve connected with these people. They actually ended up providing encouragement to us in ways we never dreamed.

When is the last time you took a risk and invited someone new into your home?